Lemons are an interesting fruit – on their own, they’re so sour they’re almost punishing to your tastebuds, but when you add sugar and put them in baked goods, they basically taste like sunshine. Rock on, lemons, you make everything better.
This is my favorite no-frills recipe for lemon curd. Just lemons, sugar, and eggs. And there’s no butter here, so it’s practically a health food!
I don’t mean to brag, but I’m pretty awesome at eating bread. That part of the brain that tells you when you’re full and to stop eating – it basically shuts down when there is baked dough in front of me and as a result, I have, on more than one occasion, eaten an entire loaf in one day, if not one sitting. It’s just, so good, whether plain or toasted, with Nutella or jam, or loaded with fixin’s for a sandwich.
You are my favorite thing, bread. My very favorite thing. Side note: if you haven’t seen Fringe, you are seriously missing out. Once you get past season 1, which was, admittedly, pretty rough, it’s one of the most incredible shows, with brilliant acting and superb storytelling and oh god, why do I do this to myself, I am crying again just watching that scene and I think I need to do some emotional eating, so thank god I have this loaf of bread here.
Ignoring the fact that I get way too emotionally invested in TV shows, there’s really nothing like a fresh loaf of challah bread. Soft and sturdy and eggy and delicious, it’s perfectly complemented by a nice layer of jam and even better when made into french toast. Just try not to eat it all in one sitting.
For this week’s Muffin Monday, I decided to go with something festive since it’s Mardi Gras on Tuesday, so naturally, King Cake! Now, the last time I had a King Cake was in middle school French class, so my memory of them has more or less disintegrated. According to the internet, they’re basically a giant cinnamon roll sometimes also filled with fruit and cream cheese and then covered in a simple glaze and colored sugar. I remember them being good, but pretty dense and heavy, and I knew that’s not how I wanted this muffin version to be.
I decided to go with a basic muffin batter lightly spiced with cinnamon and then filled with both cream cheese and sauteed apples. Then I topped them off with a simple glaze and yellow, purple, and green sanding sugar.
The end result has all the festiveness and deliciousness of a King Cake but is lighter and won’t weigh you down the way a typical King Cake does. Give up anything else for Lent, just not these muffins.
I’ll be completely honest: I’ve never had Thai coffee. I’m not particularly sure what make these muffins Thai coffee muffins – I guess the coriander and cardamom? But just two spices wasn’t enough for me, so I ended up adding a bunch more, so the ones I made are even less Thai coffee muffins than the version in the book.
Sorry, Thai coffee lovers out there, for bastardizing your drink. These muffins probably have nothing in common with their namesake, but they’re so delicious it doesn’t even matter.
I found a can of evaporated milk in the back of my pantry this weekend, which, naturally, got me to thinking of zombies. The reason it made me think of the undead is because I saw the expiration date said February 2012, a full YEAR ago. I almost threw it out, but then I decided that would be wasteful, and then I thought about how I couldn’t afford to be so picky when/if the zombie apocalypse happens because food will be so scarce that I’ll have no choice but to ignore expiration dates.
So I used the can of milk that expired a year ago and made this loaf of lemon cake. Because it’s never too early to prepare your palate for the apocalypse. And it actually tasted fine, so I wonder if expiration dates are really just another clever marketing scheme.
Another thing I learned while making this loaf is that, when the apocalypse happens, the first thing I’m doing is getting rid of my zesters. I love them dearly and they’re great tools, but no matter how careful I try to be, my flesh always, always finds its way underneath their razor-sharp blades. (Why is it always the tiniest cuts that bleed the most? And how do zesters stay so sharp even after years of use?! There are so many things I don’t understand about zesters.) And the last thing I want in a zombie apocalypse is to have a situation like in season 2 of the Walking Dead when T-Dog (RIP, you heroic angel) sliced his arm while the group was hiding on the highway and attracted the entire horde of walkers. Can you tell I’m excited for this show to come back from hiatus?
So, long story short, in case of the apocalypse:
- Expiration dates don’t matter.
- Get rid of your zesters.
- If you can scrounge up all the ingredients, make this loaf and bond with your fellow survivors.