I’m gonna sidebar here for a moment and describe a food experience I had this weekend that has nothing to do with these muffins. This is totally out of the ordinary, of course, because my posts are usually so topical (said no one ever). Here goes. I finally tried coconut water. I know, I know, I’m about 1 year behind on this particular trend, but it was one of those things that I was always meaning to try but was always too lazy to go out of my way to acquire. So this weekend, I saw it on sale at my grocery store (impulse shopping, it’ll get you every time) and decided to buy a carton.
There’s really only one thing I have to say about coconut water. YO, THIS SHIT IS RANK. Or rather, this particular beverage is not quite to my liking. But really, THIS IS SOME NASTY ASS EXCUSE FOR WATER. I mean, I didn’t expect it to taste like coconut milk or anything, I just figured it would taste like water but with a faint hint of coconut essence. Not even close. It tastes like someone left rotten fruit in a bowl of water and then decided to bottle and sell it. Sorry for the visual. It was so disgusting I googled it and apparently its putrid taste is a known fact. How did this become such a huge thing? Have all those people I would see coming out of the gym chugging a bottle of this stuff really been secretly gagging the whole time? I’m actually looking at the carton right now and on the back, there’s a little icon that says it’s the Official Coconut Water of the Olympics. As if those poor athletes weren’t already suffering enough in Sochi, they also have to drink this shit? Ugh. Ugh ugh ugh.
I do have to say though, as a marketing major and someone who works in advertising, I have to give huge, gargantuan props to the people who have been marketing this junk. Well played, you assholes. Well played.
So I was at Broadway Panhandler a while ago and saw The Cherry Chomper. It’s so adorable and I considered buying it, but then I thought, when am I ever going to pit cherries, right, right?! Ha ha, WRONG.
My kitchen looked like a crime scene, or perhaps Dexter’s lab, after all this pitting. No, not that Dexter, this Dexter. These muffins were super tasty and the chopped cherries added the perfect burst of flavor, so I should probably just give in and get that Cherry Chomper after all.
And I guess I forgot to take a picture of these, probably because I was too busy cleaning cherry entrails out from underneath my fingernails.